Friday, September 30, 2011

Pantyhose Curiosity

This is my life and pantyhose are an integral part of it, but I really don't know why I'm this way.  I can probably cite the exact date on which I consciously became aware of my addiction to pantyhose, but that doesn't help me understand my compulsive behavior.  I must admit that I am always curious about those of us living this pantyhose lifestyle.  How did we get this way?  What started it?  I've talked with many living this lifestyle and through conversations we can learn a lot about one another, but you have to know someone pretty well before they'll open up and tell you about the intimate details of their personal pantyhose lifestyle.  And not everyone is introspective on this topic or able to express themselves in a way that helps to reveal deeper understanding.

I've always been a curious person, not just curious about the pantyhose lifestyle we lead, but curious in general.  I like to know what motivates people to do the things that they do.  For example, if you told me you decided to return to night school to get your MBA I could just congratulate you on making that decision and wish you good luck but I know I'd be too curious to stop there.  I'd want to ask what motivated your decision, what's happening at work right now that got you thinking about it, what other alternatives you considered in addition to the MBA program you selected.  In other words, I'd ask you many questions and probably bug the heck out of you!

To help satisfy my curiosity about the pantyhose lifestyle, each month I create a new survey on Pantyhose Share Club.  The monthly survey attempts to address some of the burning questions that many living our pantyhose lifestyle (including me!) have often asked themselves.  The survey allows Pantyhose Share Club members and others an outlet to provide anonymous feedback about their pantyhose compulsion, and the anonymous information obtained through the survey is published on the website to provide everyone with deeper insight into our collective community. 

The October survey is now ready and I invite your participation.  You don't need to be a member of Pantyhose Share Club to complete the survey, though I'd like you to consider joining us if you've not done so already.  This month the survey addresses the question of how and when we established our pantyhose compulsion.  Follow this link to take the survey > http://www.PantyhoseShareClub.net/pantyhose-survey.php

I'm looking forward to sharing more with you soon.

J.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Managing Pantyhose Compulsion

We often say we're "addicted" to pantyhose but I believe the behavior that most of us pantyhose "addicts" exhibit is really a compulsion towards pantyhose.  Here are the two definitions straight out of Dictionary.com:

Addiction - the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

Compulsion - a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, especially one that is irrational or contrary to one's will.

For me, putting on pantyhose each morning is a ritual act that is a deeply ingrained part of my routine.  If I neglect my pantyhose for a day or two I don't incur severe trauma but I do feel a bit naked without them and I'll wear them on day 3 even if it's 100 degrees out.  This behavior seems to me to be more consistent with compulsion than addiction.

I ran into an online friend the other day for the first time in over a month.  I was beginning to suspect he might be gone forever but eventually I did see him again and even though we didn't have much time to catch up it sure was nice to see him again.  Now you may have friends that disappear now and then.  I know I sometimes disappear myself when my husband indicates I've been investing too much time in one of my pantyhose "projects".  My survey project last year immediately comes to mind, and after I closed that project I think I was absent for a while, probably longer than a month.

My pantyhose compulsion is more than just the daily routine of selecting and putting on a pair of pantyhose.  It extends to my projects like that now defunct survey and my website development at PantyhoseShareClub.net.  These projects are definitely time consuming and I know that can irritate my spouse, but provided there's a positive result like a nice looking, often visited website, the time spent is considered worthwhile.  For others though, like my long lost and now re-found friend, the pantyhose compulsion can become a time sink where hour upon hour are spent engaged in the adoration of pantyhose images or an endless search for the perfect pantyhose picture.  I'm not trying to be judgemental, but I am trying to look at this from the point of view of my friend's spouse.  I suspect there's just not much redeeming positive value she's going to see in that activity.

I suppose I should have suspected something was going on with my friend, after all I hadn't seen him in over a month.  In hindsight I should have been more sensitive to that, but barely a minute into our first conversation in over a month I asked if he'd seen all the changes I've made to the website.  That's when he told me he's been trying to manage his compulsion lately (at the request of his spouse) and he'd not visited the website in a while.  Of course I immediately felt bad for throwing out my inquiry before even asking why he'd not been around lately, but upon hearing his explanation I must say that I deeply respect that he is actively recognizing and managing his pantyhose compulsion.

In as much as I accept the person that I am, pantyhose compulsion and all, I have to also accept, and appreciate, others wanting to be something different than what this compulsion makes of them.  I am dedicated to a pantyhose lifestyle that includes helping others to manage their pantyhose compulsion, and I truly hope my friend finds success as mutually defined by he and his spouse.  I deliberately mention this mutual definition of success because I fear that if defining success is left solely to the non-compulsory partner, success might be defined as total elimination of pantyhose!

Spouses, please listen closely... in my experience this DOES NOT WORK!  Pantyhose addicts are wired for pantyhose, maybe not at birth, but the compulsion develops at an early age, this I've learned through literally hundreds of conversations with others compelled to live (openly or not) the pantyhose lifestyle.  So I urge you to negotiate as partners to gain consensus on a definition of success that includes some element of the lifestyle, perhaps with a time-management aspect, so that success can be viable.

If you are actively managing pantyhose compulsion and are achieving some measure of success in doing so, I would like to hear from you!  Speak up and share your experience with others practicing this lifestyle.  Your contributions will prove valuable to many.

I'm looking forward to sharing more with you soon.

J.